Posted tagged ‘advice’

My friend Katie’s wedding advice

July 8, 2011

Katie on her wedding day

A few weeks ago I was freaking out over the idea of people not coming to my wedding. Very shortly after publishing a blog post on this topic, I received a long email from my friend Katie (check out her blog). It turns out she had similar feelings while planning her wedding. I appreciated her sympathy,  but most importantly I appreciated her advice.

She said it can be easy to focus on the people who don’t come to your wedding– especially if you’ve made every effort to attend theirs or be an overall good friend to them.  But wallowing in your disappointment, sadness, or even anger serves no purpose. Instead, it’s better to focus on the people who are coming to your wedding.

In Katie’s case, she had people attend the event she totally didn’t expect would (because they lived far away). It really touched her they came, and ever since she’s grown closer with them. So if anything, at least a couple of friendships grew stronger from the wedding.

For some reason, this advice really hit home. Since hearing from Katie, I’ve had some more people say they’re can’t make it to the wedding. But I’ve also had some others say they can. I now know those are the ones who really matter.

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Quitting your job without a new job lined up

December 8, 2010

I know several people who have recently quit their job without another one lined up. Some have saved up a lot of money, so they can afford this life change. Others have had it so much with their job they’re willing to suffer financially and even physically until they find a new one. That might mean buying cheaper groceries, losing health insurance, or ultimately moving in with a family member.

I think it’s really a slap in the face when one of your employees quits without another gig. It’s like the person disliked working for you so much that he’d rather have no source of income than one of your paychecks. Sometimes, though, it’s totally worth it to leave a company without any immediate work plans. If your job is so stressful or time-consuming you don’t have the motivation or opportunity to look for another job at the end of the day, then you’ll be stuck with this job forever.

If your job is so mindless or frustrating you are depressed each day you have to show up, then continuing with this job is probably not the best thing to do. It’s probably better to quit, improve your mental state, and figure out what you want to do next. You’ll have the time and proper disposition to identify your objective, apply for jobs or grad school, and do what else it takes to achieve your goal. (more…)